Showing posts with label the man-friend. Show all posts
Showing posts with label the man-friend. Show all posts

Saturday, May 1, 2010

100 Posts and Seriously Wondering What the Future Holds

So yeah, this is officially my 100th post and uh . . . I'm still alive. You may think I'm saying this because my blogging has been quite sporadic lately but that's not it. I'm saying this because I'm a survivor. Allow me to catch you up.


First things first, the man-friend lost his job. Yes. You read right. He lost his job the day before we went on our vacation. I would get into the details, but it was for a stupid reason and the management at his job are insecure, spineless, incompetent, dickwads that have been making really bad decisions that have lead to a lot of people being cut from that department (in the worst way) over the past year. Another thing, the manfriend makes literally about 3 times as much as I do (which translates to a whole lotta money) and it's going to be interesting seeing where this situation goes.

Second of all, we went on vacation and had to digest this information the whole time we were away. It was interesting the different transitions we went through, especially considering that we knew when we got back (Thursday) we were going to have only 2 weeks before I head off to Japan. So there was sadness, anger, more anger, numbness, confusion, laughter and later on, acceptance. We made the most of the trip and have been diving into the job hunt thing with high hopes and a whole lot of prayers.

So what this all boils down to is this . . . when I get back from Japan next year, (God-willing) the man-friend and pup will have started a new life somewhere without me. Can you imagine? I will be overseas, while my little family is picking up and moving and making all kinds of decisions that I can't be a part of. *Sigh* Life is crazy.

Either way, I am hoping for the best because the man-friend is the last person who deserves to be fired or looking for a job. He's always been that guy. You know? The "go to" guy who stays at work late emailing everyone to let them know what's going on, learning equipment and taking the initiative to create things while everyone else has long gone home and went to bed. He comes up with creative ideas (despite the fact that he doesn't get any credit for them) and has been respectful and personable to everyone in every department for the 17 years that he's been employed with the place . . . yes, 17 years. There have been times when he's gone to work and stayed so late that he comes back the next day and I've literally had to fix him a plate and drive it to the job for him. No one else has taken these kinds of initiatives and to tell you the truth, there's a teensy weensy part of me that is a little happy that he's gone from that place. Maybe this means that he will finally start looking into some management positions (something I have been pushing him to do for a while now, anyway).

One of the biggest arguments and problems that I've always had with the man-friend is his tendency to procrastinate and/or stay in a situation that is in desperate need of an upgrade. He just gets comfortable and won't budge, despite my aggressive nudging and hinting. To his credit I can be a super emotional, overly suspicious, cynical, paranoid, pain in the butt . . . BUT, I am still a female and my "wimmin's intuition" is rarely off target. So I'd been giving the old man hints that he should upgrade to another job for over a year now, and I think this kind of shows that I wasn't so crazy after-all. Either way, this wasn't the way I wished it would happen, but I guess it was necessary to whatever major change was meant to take place in our lives.


So enough of that . . . I have about 12 days left before I am on an airplane flying over the Pacific Ocean. It's been a little overwhelming lately with all of the parties and people wanting to meet up. Unfortunately, with all of the phone calls and "let's get together before you go" invitations, I have gotten just 3 donations to my ChipIn account to buy an Amazon Kindle (and one of them kind of doesn't count because it's from the man-friend). It's a little disappointing considering the many gifts and favors that I've given to friends over the years. I talked to my ex boyfriend this morning and he made a really good point. He says that I've done favors for people and given gifts, but that people don't appreciate it because they don't know the monetary value of what I've done. For example, I've provided services (on several occasions) for my friends that otherwise would have cost them thousands of dollars. My ex was saying that if I'd have provided an actual invoice that said, $2,500 (or whatever) that people would get a better idea of how much money they've saved or how much work was put into a project. I totally get what he was saying and agree with him, but at the end of the day I have just been blown away at the fact that it is taking this long for people to give . . . what? . . . $5 to my account after I've jumped at the opportunity to contribute to any major milestones in their lives. Also, I've always been proactive about helping my friends out, whereas I haven't received not one phone call asking if there is anything they can do/help me with. Am I taking this too far? Maybe I'm expecting too much. The man-friend has always said that I'm a really good friend and I go the extra mile for people but I always assumed that this was something that my friends would be willing to do for me in return. Guess I was wrong. (Insert sad face and womp, womp, wooomp sound effect).

Either way, I am gearing up to go to Japan and am quite sure that this will be the furthest thing from my mind when I arrive. I will be running around doing all kinds of stuff and will probably be missing my family, the man-friend and these same self-centered, inconsiderate friends that I've been moaning and complaining about in this post. Right now I am doing my best to spend as much time as possible with my doggy's daddy before I go (which isn't too hard because we have a lot more time to spend together now that he's unemployed . . . cue the laugh track). Oh, and highlight to our vacation (which was at Disney World by the way), one of the characters sees me and the man-friend walking arm and arm and says, "You guys look like a happy couple. I bet you're celebrating something!" and the man-friend says without missing a beat . . .

"We're celebrating the fact that I just got fired from my job!"

And then we just burst out laughing as the poor guy stood there looking at us with confusion. Needless to say, we have been curbing the stress of the situation by exercising our morbid sense of humor and actually, it's been effective.

So things are insane right now, but for some odd reason I believe they are going to get better. I hope they are going to get better.

Fortune cookie - cookies wallpaper

And since when did Brian McKnight get a late night talk show? (Yes, I know that was mad random but his talk show is mad random. It's like, where the heck did it come from? I never even saw a commercial for it. Okay, I really need to go to bed, LOL)

Goodnight Brian McKnight. Goodnight everybody!

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Men are From Mars


I got into an argument with the man-friend on the car ride to work this morning. It started out as a casual conversation about the sense of entitlement that the majority of the male species seem to have. The man-friend was pretty agreeable, and in fact was the one that initiated the conversation in the first place based on the funny video clip from the 3 Amigos that I posted the other day. He shook his head at the idea of knowing that a man would actually consider killing someone who didn't return their sexual advances but said that to a degree (and as a man) he knows how men think and that they do tend to have a higher sense of entitlement than women.

So in his random way of telling pointless stories (which is something we both have in common as you can see by this post) he proceeds to tell me about how he went upstairs to walk the neighbor's dog (backstory to that is . . . she broke her leg and we've been doing the neighborly thing for her- we have a very "I Love Lucy" relationship with our neighbors) so anywho, he was waiting while she was getting the dog ready and noticed that her HD television was not on an HD channel. He then tells her to turn the station to the HD version of whatever channel it was already on, which she does, and he begins to explain to her the way the channels work and how HD stations work and all kinds of jibberish that I'm sure she just nodded, smiled and listened to. (If you haven't already guessed, the man-friend works in the television business). So according to his story, he finishes his HD television monologue with the words, "This is the channel you SHOULD be watching."

Now when he got to the end of his story, I laughed and said that "that is a perfect example of entitlement." What? he asked. "Coming into someone's house, telling them to turn the channel to something else and explaining to them why they should be watching that." Of course, he argued that he was helping her and that she was grateful and as someone with an HD set, she should be watching HD channels. I told him that could very well be the case but to actually tell someone they should be doing anything in their own home takes a certain level of . . . waaait for it . . . entitlement. Hence, the argument commences.

I don't know, maybe I was just reading into it more than I should and I'm sure that the neighbor was appreciative and receptive to his "friendly and helpful" diatribe about the benefits of HD but I just found the story a good example of the naturalness in which men (or at least most of the ones I know) tend to, you know, direct folks around. Now this is not to exclude women, because I know a number of women who will tell someone what they ought to be doing in a heartbeat. But when it comes to men, they have a monopoly on that ish. I have had guys come up to me and tell me that I should walk my dog more (while I'm walking my dog), tell me why I'm single (even though I'm in a relationship) or just explain to me the benefits or disadvantages of something that I never asked them about in the first place. And sometimes it's helpful, but I can't help but to ask myself if I'd ever feel that comfortable saying the same kinds of things in the same exact ways. Like I imagine that, had I given our neighbor the same HD tv tutorial, I would have ended it with, "but at the end of the day, it's about whatever you feel comfortable watching. I just think it looks better on such-and-such channel." and not, "That's what you SHOULD do, heffer!" lol, okay, well he didn't call her a heffer, but...

Another example of that subtle "masculine entitlement thing" would be how much space men take up. For example, it's hard as heck to walk down the street with the man friend because he refuses to budge for people and if our arms are linked, I always have to be the one getting slammed into whoever is coming into our direction. So I end up falling back a little, dipping and dodging because he and the other men who refuse to budge feel entitled to the whole dang sidewalk. I guess it's just in a man's genes and I'm also sure that it comes from centuries and centuries of running ish.

So the car ride got a little hostile when I half jokingly said, "You make me sick!" and the man-friend (half seriously) replied, "You make me sick too, I can't wait to drop your butt off at work!" GASP! How dare he???!!! I had to pull out the last weapon I had. I did what any female would do if their man told them he wants her out of his sight . . . I got a little quiet. "What's wrong?" (pause) "Don't be mad," he said looking over every so often to make sure...I don't know...that my head didn't explode or something. When I get quiet, the man-friend can't bear it. Suckerrrr! lol
Needless to say, I just got a text that says "I love you" so yeah, men may have a sense of entitlement but it's up to a woman to pound that ish into the ground.