Watch This!!!

Please watch the trailer for my new comedy web series!  It's funny, delightful and stars two very talented ladies.

Enjoy!

Act Like a Woman, Think Like a Man

Taking a little break from the web series stuff this week and wanted to talk about something that makes me chuckle to myself.  I'm sure everyone's heard about the Steve Harvey book, Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man.  And then there's the movie that's coming out with the same name.  Now there's a J-hud, Neo Rick Ross song called Think Like a Man.

Now the book, song and movie all have the same thing in common.  They're pretty-much telling women that they should think like men.  That's the main focus.  Okay, whatever.  I get it.  But what about the "Act Like a Lady" part?  I think that's where I'm having trouble, lol.  I was raised in a family with all women.  1 Single parent mom, 2 aunts, 2 sisters, a half sister and 1 step sister.  You would have thought that with all of this estrogen, I would have gotten at least one feminine trait.  The boyfriend argues with that...thank god!  (He's one of the few guys that can overlook my weirdness).

Either way, I could use some Act Like a Lady lessons in these 3 areas . . . 

1.  Clothing - I know that mixing and matching clothing and styles is "in" now, but I don't think that the clothes I wear is what fashionistas have in mind.  Kid you not, my every day, lounging around the house "go to" style is an oversized red, Coca-cola T-shirt tucked into a faded, black, chiffon skirt with long, white socks.  It looks HORRIBLE.  The only reason the boyfriend likes this outfit is because I only wear it when I don't feel like wearing underwear which is like everyday.  Ladylike?  I didn't think so.  And when I leave the privacy of my own home, it's no better.  My version of getting dressed up is putting on jeans.  And I can't wear high heels for longer than a half hour.

2.  Getting Out the Car - Can't do it.  Correction, can't do it without looking like a dude.  And if I'm wearing heels...just leave me in the damned thing.  The struggling and grunting that accompanies my getting out of a car is laughable and then a little sad.  Yeah, lessons please.

3.  Chit-chat - I SUCK at "lady-like" chit chat.  I snort when I laugh and like to talk about things that are gross.  For example, pooping.  That is like my favorite subject . . . pooping and movies.

So yeah, any help would be appreciated.  How about somebody focusing on the "Act Like a Lady" part of the book for a change?

Just a thought.  :-)

On another note...

I'm planning on applying to grad school.  Yes, you heard me.  All of those worries about being in debt for the rest of my life have taken a back seat to my worries about letting life pass me by.  I can't take another year of sitting in this living room applying to a bunch of low level jobs because I don't have the skills necessary to land something better.  I went to college so I wouldn't have to worry about that.  It's obvious that our country has shifted and now you need more than a 4 year degree to get the big normal, middle-class dollars.  Apparently, the only person that didn't know that was me.   So it's time to get my ish together.  When you know better . . . (sigh)  Either way, my plan is to move to California. My timeline is August of this year.  I have to take my GRE's and start doing research.  The thought of all of the work I have to do is a little scary, but exciting.  It's time to take another big chance.  I don't know if this is the direction God wants me to go in, but I'm getting tired of guessing what's going on with the Big Guy's plans for me.  He's a little hard to read these days, so I'm just going to go for it and regret (or celebrate) it later, like I've done my whole life.  I think it's safe to say that I suck at reading the "signs."

This plan kind of gives me the same feelings that I felt when I was about to leave for Japan.  Doubts, fears, excitement, adventure, confusion, worry, happiness, everything.  I'm just a big mixture of feelings.  Am I really going to go through with this?  Ahhh.  But it's coming.  Something's definitely coming, I can feel it.  So, as I've been telling everybody these days . . .

Send me good vibes people!

Why I Don't Get Enough Love

So this morning whilst checking my email, I came across a comment that my dear friend Stephanie over at Not the Oxygen left on one of my posts.

@Arnetta: I just posted your link on 20sb for blogs that don't get enough love because I think you don't...and you're cool. I don't know what the problem is :P

First of all . . . I heart you Stephy-Poo and if you ever want to go gay (minus the monogamy and the sexy time) I'm all for it . . . and secondly *shrugs* I don't know what's up wit dat either. I'm like the little match girl of blogs. I've resigned myself to the idea that I'm just a "starving artist." Someone who blogs to release tension, whether the world is watching or not. I mean, I wouldn't mind a few more followers, but at this point I'm just happy to have an outlet. Either way, these are some of the reasons - real or imaginary - why I think I don't have a million and one (or even 11) followers.

- My blogging is way too sporadic. I will sometimes blog every day and then just not blog for a week/month (although I've been blogging a lot lately). Sometimes the blogs will be funny, sometimes serious, sometimes a little bit of both. Maybe this confuses people.

- I don't have an interesting enough life. In other words, the "man-friend" stories are not cutting it, lol.

- I am an anonymous blogger. I think it's harder for people to connect with someone they can't see. (That's probaby a big one)

- I have garlic breath. And somehow people can smell it through the interwebs. (I eat a lot of italian food)

- My writing does not translate the way I think it does and it comes off confusing, negative, hokey, depressing, corny, random, (fill in the blank).

- I don't have a "thing." You know, a theme, like Lilu's TMI - Thursdays or Re-Ramblings "Pot Luck" Posts or RebelMel's "Freeby Fridays."

- I don't post comments on enough blogs. To tell you the truth, I don't have the time. But the 15 or 16 blogs that I do frequent get their fair share of comments from Arnetta Green, trust that.

- I'm not badass butt enough

- I get too philosophical. This is something I've been accused of doing in "real life." Just talking about life, feelings, relationships, history and maybe people don't want to hear that ish.

- I don't twitter, or reveal my facebook info.

- My layout or title is not cool enough.

- Either, a very influential blogger didn't like a comment I left on a blog or they read one of my posts and didn't like it...so they black listed me, turning the whole web world against me.

- (This is not really a reason-but it further explains my "black-listed" conjecture) So there's a blogger that I used to follow and I noticed that every time I would make a comment, she would never respond. Which was kind of odd, because she wasn't a "hands off" kind of blogger. Okay, whatever, I thought to myself. Maybe she didn't get around to reading my comment. So one day, she'd gotten quite a few comments and responded to each and every one of them, big and small, generic and personal, every last one...all except mine. Coincidence? I don't think so. And I swear my comments were stuff like, "Your dog is beautiful. What breed is he?" or "That looked like fun. Glad it came together for you!" I'm telling you...I'm blacklisted! You guys might want to be careful not to get black-listed by association.

- Maybe I'm excluding a demographic. Sometimes I talk about subjects like race, class and gender. And frankly, that can just be "too heavy" for people. *shrugs*

- Not enough pictures on my blog. You know blog-readers are "baby brains." They need the pictures to keep them going. Morons!

- Maybe I'm too condescending to my potential-followers. Calling them "morons" and "baby brains."

- I don't have enough skills/hobbies or enough . . . I don't know "life" in my life. Like I don't garden, not a clean freak, don't sew/knit or cook too often...my schedule (right now) is overly-packed with work...and when I get home, I mainly just walk the dog, watch tv and go to sleep. Okay...aaand maybe this is the part of the post where I should just kill myself, LOL.

- Maybe I'm just too fabulous and you morons guys can't relate.

- Maybe I'm not fabulous?

- ...nah! I'm fabulous.

Well, that's all I got for now. But all jokes aside, I absolutely love blogging and appreciate any comments, "following" or support that I get. You guys are a small group, but you lift my spirits and make me feel a little less crazy every day.

All right, enough mushyness. Time to get back to work, but first allow me to leave you with this delightful find.

You're welcome! :)

My New Favorite Commercial

and . . . he's (cough, cough) kind of (cough) cute too! lol

It's the F@#$ing Catalina Wine Mixer!!!

Warning: If you're playing this at work, turn the volume down (or wear headsets). The language is colorful.

Enjoy! It's the F#$%ing Catalina Wine Mixer!!!