Thursday, September 10, 2009

A Very Strange Pattern I've Noticed

In my life, at any given time, I always manage to make spontaneous enemies out of a certain demographic. Ready to hear who I always manage to piss off for no reason? It's always short, middle-aged White women. Lol, I just don't get it. It has nothing to do with race (that I can tell), or height (on my end) or age (no discrimination over here), but I swear it never fails. It's like clockwork. No matter where I go, there is some short, middle-aged White woman that loves everybody else, but can't even look in my direction without rolling their eyes to the back of their head and heaving a long, deep sigh of disgust. It's hilarious, but a little strange. And, I swear, I don't do anything to cause it. (Innocent smile :-) I really don't, though, seriously. I'm a nice person and I don't dress crazy or anything. (Oh, and for the record, I'm tall, black and 26 years of age).

There have been plenty of these women in my history, but I'll just mention three. The first person I've ever noticed was this lady at my job who one day started giving me nasty stares. I didn't really know why (because I don't work directly with the lady and never had a conversation with her) so I assumed it was my imagination and kept it moving. But I've noticed, she literally has to prepare herself to walk past me down the hall . . . it's an interesting sight to see. And I've seen her hesitate on several occasions, sometimes turning around because it's just too much for her. (And I assure you, reader, I am a clean and hygienic person - why, I even took a shower this morning and brushed my teeth to boot!) She hates me with the fire of a thousand suns. In a weird, twisted sort of way, it kinda makes me warm inside. :-)

So then there was the lady on my company's softball team. She just flat out doesn't speak to me. I didn't know she had it out for me until the coach told me that she's been trying to get him to kick me off the team (or at least, not play me) since forever. Again, no clue as to what caused the sudden hate. I'm not the best player on the team but I'm definitely not the worst. At one point, the coach told me she asked him to play someone with an injury rather than me. Sucks for her, though, because everybody else gets to play with my cute puppy when I bring him to the softball games, while she has to sit alone looking stank. Don't feel sorry for her, she's only doing it to herself.

So in typical short, middle-aged, White lady fashion, my boss hates my guts. It doesn't shock me one bit. I am friendly to her, I stay out of her way, I even . . . no, that's about it. I just stay friendly and stay out of her way, because I know that every time she sees me she's going to chew me out for something real or imagined. Our first conversation started with an insult and our beautiful relationship has blossomed ever since. One of my coworkers warned me to stay out of her way the other day. "For some strange reason, I think she has it out for you" he said, with a perplexed look on his face. I guess he was confused as to why anybody would have it out for me (I'm one of the nicer people at my job). I couldn't explain it to him. Hell, I don't really understand it myself.

I just take it as a strange pattern in my life. Makes for an interesting post, though. Any short, middle-aged White women care to explain? :-)

2 comments:

  1. I wonder what you're doing. Maybe you send subliminal messages you aren't aware of.

    There's a lady at the school where I've been adopted. I coudln't figure out if she was giving me dirty looks. I thought there's no way considering I had just laid eyes on the woman, I seriously thought she just had an ugly scowl on her face & couldn't control it. Nope, it's just her giving me looks. So much for the benefit of the doubt.

    Some people just suck I guess.

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  2. Lol, I swear it's not me! Every single one of these women are people I didn't even know existed before finding out they hated my guts. I used to tell my friends about my ability to piss off the most random people and they used to think it was crazy talk. Now they all see it and think it's hilarious! You just gotta have a sense of humor about it I guess. My grandmother used to say "if you're making someone angry, you're doing something right." I think my grams must have had the same pattern of pissing random folk off that I do, lol.

    The lady at your school sounds like a piece of work. You should ask her if she has any more of that sour candy she's sucking on. Or maybe offer her some prunes? hehe :-)

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